Summarizing the description of psychological support for young people in crisis “meeting with adulthood”, you should again be noted that it is necessary to stay deep and leads to the enrichment of the individual, the expansion of its self-consciousness, is a significant step forward in the achievement of personal maturity. As evidence of this can cause aging of the work of young people who have already passed the crisis and trying to understand the changes occurring to them.
“This year is a strange. It is this. Neither I, nor II course these were not. I was seriously thinking, “Who am I”. I understand that this is a fairly common trivial question, but still. I’m trying to rebuild something in yourself the way I want to, not the way I wanted someone. Gradually fading childhood dream, but it does not crash, but just ended yesterday and the next page begins. A complete stranger. And, as always, trying to fill it without corrections, error, but for some reason does not work. But unlike past years, you realize that here these blots are my wealth, my victories over the fact that I do not like first of all to myself. Another purchase my age – you start to think about the future in a serious way, not in the children’s dreams. More assess their chances. But the last thing I want to note that happy feeling of something new that is born in me. And I’m very interested to live. ”
“Now I know what the name of the crisis that I experienced. The main thing – to know that it exists, and do not be afraid of it, because every crisis involves a new phase in our lives. I used to think that the crisis will not survive this crisis will never go away. But now I realized that I was wrong. The crisis passed, I got off the ground. I just looked at the world through different eyes. Much of what I considered a minus, gradually turned into pluses. This situation has helped me understand myself, to look at the people around me in a different way. ”
“So when will this crisis? And it is not a crisis at all, but a maze of questions and answers. The main thing – to find the right, the correct answer. And the questions you ask yourself? Ran out of questions? Then get out of the maze, others also need to be answered. ”
“… I will not describe my feelings at this stage of the journey, except to say that it has led to a neurosis. To a normal classical neurosis with depression and extremely unpleasant psychosomatic manifestations. I feel weak, helpless and in despair at the thought that it always will be. Something that happened to me was the first major crisis in my life. But now, after some time, I’m glad what happened.
They say that neurosis is an illness – it’s bad of him to get rid of as soon as possible and to avoid repetition. I do not quite agree. For me, neurosis became a threshold step in my development. It was then, once outside the usual hustle and bustle of life, I began to think about himself and his place in this world, the meaning of life and human destiny. Reflection – a great benefit. I do not know at what point there was a change in my perception of the world, I did not catch it then, I can not track down now, but I gradually changed. I say “little by little”, though, most of all, it happened suddenly, just took me a while to realize and accept this change. It is difficult to describe the feeling of the words …. I suddenly realized what a miracle – Life! Throughout her chaotic civilization, people naizobretali many “engineering marvels” and completely forgot about a real miracle. It is in us: in humans, in animals and birds, in colors and crystals, snowflakes and rainbows. Of course, I’m not trying to make this extraordinary feeling into words, I just felt it. I had only to focus on the petals of a flower or the bends shells, and all the small everyday troubles literally coming to naught. Move, see, breathe – all of this is the usual and customary before, we now bring me great joy. And I realized that I only experienced the pain and helplessness, you can feel the happiness.
I’m trying to consistently describe the changes taking place with me, but in reality all the feelings and sensations are closely interrelated and their separation more than probation. Experiencing the joy of life gave me a new feeling, which I realized only recently. It’s not even a feeling, but rather, a condition that can be described by the word “peace.” Not indifference, not a certainty, it is not indifference, namely mind. I suddenly felt that my life is right that it should be so. This does not mean that I have become fatalist, or a robot or a zombie. I still can sincerely rejoice and grieve, love and hate, but neither joy nor sorrow, do not take me out of balance. A feeling as if I were at the same time feel a sense and watch a side (or top, just do not know). Respect for and interest in their inner world and the mystery of his identity has led to the fact that any manifestation of life has become for me sacred. It sounds very pompous, but I can not find a more appropriate definition. Perhaps the sense of wonder stay in this beautiful world has become a major “peak experience” in this segment of my life’s journey. I do not know if I can keep this miracle for the rest of my life, but I will try to do it, because the feeling of fullness of existence makes me happy and able to enjoy life in all its manifestations. ”
3. The crisis of “mid-life” and especially psychological support
What are the specifics of the crisis, “mid-life”?
As Carl Jung believed, the nearer the middle of life, the more a person thinks that found the right ideas, and principles of conduct. But too often, social approval is due to loss of integrity of the individual, an excessive focus on one or another of its aspects. In addition, many are trying to move the psychology of the phase of youth across the threshold of maturity. If, for example, an evening meeting old friends turns into a night of memories of how used to be good, we can recall the words of Carl Jung: “Just going back to the past, to his heroic student’s time, they are able to rekindle the flame of life.” So at the age of 35-40 years, frequent depression, certain neurotic disorders, and suggest that the occurrence of the crisis. According to Jung, the essence of this crisis is to meet a man with his unconscious. Jung very vividly describes his own meeting with him, when he gave full freedom to their unconscious impulses. And then he remembered his childhood experience of playing with blocks, building castles and houses made of bottles. Finally, after a long internal resistance he began to play: built of stones a few houses and a castle – a small village. And so he started to play whenever there are difficulties in front of him. Carl Jung wrote that everything of value that he made at that time, it was related to his work with the stone. But in order for a person to meet his unconscious, he must make the transition from extensive to intensive positions, from the desire to expand and conquer the living space to focus on one’s self. And then the second half of life will serve to achieve wisdom, the climax of creation, rather than neurosis and despair. I would like to emphasize the words of Carl Jung that the human soul is the second half of life profoundly surprising changes. But, unfortunately, writes Jung, most intelligent and educated people are not aware of the possibility of such changes. As a consequence unprepared enter the second half of life.
Similar views on the nature of the crisis, “mid-life” expressed B.Livehud. He called the age of 35-45 years, a point of divergent paths. One of the ways – a gradual involution of mental rights in accordance with its physical involution. The other – the continuation of mental evolution in spite of the physical involution. Following the first or second path is determined, according to B. Livehudu, the degree of sophistication in its spirit. Therefore, the outcome of the crisis should be the treatment of man to his spiritual development, and then on the other side of the crisis, it will continue to develop rapidly, drawing strength from a spiritual source. Otherwise, he becomes “the mid fifties tragic personality, experiencing sadness for the good old days, the sense of threat to itself in all new.”
Great value crisis “mid-life” gave E.Erikson. Age 30-40 years old he called “the decade of the point of no” major issues which are the decrease of physical strength, vitality and a decrease in sexual attraction. By this age, as a rule, there is awareness of the difference between dreams and goals in life of man and his real position. And if the 20-year-old man is regarded as a promising, then 40 years old – is the performance data once promises. The successful resolution of the crisis, according to E. Erickson, leads to the formation of human generative (productivity, restlessness), which includes the human desire to grow, care for the next generation, and about his own contribution to the development of life on earth. In the opposite case, a stagnation, which may correspond to a sense of desolation, regression. A person can begin to indulge their own desires and pleasures, as if it were your own child.
MS Peck pays particular attention to the pain of transition from one stage of life to another. The reason for this, he sees the difficulties people to part with the worn-out ideas, working habits, camera angles from which to see the world as usual. Many people, according to the MS Peck, unwilling or unable to withstand the emotional pain associated with the process of denial of the fact that they have outgrown. So they cling to old patterns of thinking and behavior, refusing to resolving the crisis. It can be said that the fear of change, is widely prevalent today, making it difficult or even impossible for the successful resolution of the crisis.
We describe the typical symptoms of the crisis, “mid-life” in our country, illustrate them with excerpts from research N. ORESHKIN.
The crisis of “mid-life” as well as other age crises, accompanied by certain depressive feelings. This may be a reduction of interest to all events or pleasure from them, apathy. Or the person may feel the lack of systematic or decreased energy, so I have to force myself to go to work or perform household chores. Often there are feelings about worthlessness, helplessness. A special place in the depressed feelings is anxiety about their future, which is often masked by concern for the children, or even for the country as a whole.